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Things went into the crapper. And, as LiveJournal figured into the conversation (albeit only slightly), I won't rely on posting the entire pathetic little story here.

Suffice it to say, I have patterns. I repeat patterns. It must be why I like needlepoint (bad joke. Sorry). I seem to keep having relationships with people who aren't having relationships with me. Anyone else noticed that? H.W.S.R.N.? How about Hipster? n0thingman? Anyone else remember all of those non-relationships? Yea, I do.

So fuck it all. I bought smokes, and I bought alcohol, and today I plan to wallow (so far, so good). Anyone who wants to drop by and rub my head while I lie on the floor is hereby invited and welcome. I drove unixd0rk to work and drove erratically and haphazardly, so methinks the time for driving today is over (as Hipster will tell you, generally speaking, I'm an excellent driver -- ha).


( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
(Deleted comment)
Apr. 12th, 2005 06:49 pm (UTC)
Ya, tell me about it. I'm online and talking to my ex-gf, which is as good a place to be as any, I suppose. I actually cried so much this morning with him that I don't feel like I can physically cry anymore.

He's not being a jerk or anything -- we're gonna get together later on this week and talk some more (he had to go to work or else this morning's conversation would have continued longer than it did -- as it was he was more than an hour late anyway). I'm just really incredibly sad is all.
Apr. 13th, 2005 12:22 am (UTC)
I used to do that. For me, it was because I didn't really want to be in an actual relationship. Your mileage may vary.
Apr. 13th, 2005 12:40 am (UTC)
As I said to my Mother this past Thanksgiving (in the throes of H.W.S.R.N. angst), you learn what you live. Specifically, you may recall my mother the shrink and my father the nutcase. Doing dishes, I told my Mother I couldn't think of the last time I'd been involved with someone who wasn't crazy. It just feels like home, you know.

I think unixd0rk is a great guy. And I'm worried to pieces because I haven't heard from him since I dropped him off, and I know that he can get even more emotional and depressed than I can sometimes. That, plus, you know, waiting and being patient aren't exactly my strong suits.

Oh Shani, I really liked this one. I feel so incredibly sad tonight.
Apr. 13th, 2005 12:44 am (UTC)
What exactly happened, babe? Did I miss a post in my internetlessness?
Apr. 13th, 2005 12:47 am (UTC)
In the spirit of not wanting to post anything too personal about someone else on LiveJournal, I am sending you an email.

That said, this all happened this morning, so no, you didn't miss anything.
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )

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