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OK, I need to get this out:

Anyone who reads this blog knows that I hardly ever write reviews of movies or TV shows. But Sex and the City is a movie that you need to dissect afterward and, well, I went to see it alone. :(

For starters: The theme music! I need the theme music! If they ever (heaven forbid!) make a movie version of Friends, I expect it to begin with the dulcet sounds of "I'll be there for you ..." When I go to see Sex and the City, I don't want to hear some sampled-all-to-hell, barely recognizable version of the theme song -- I want the theme song, dammit! If you absolutely must do some fancy schmancy remix, have the good sense to be like The Addams Family and bury it over the end credits.

Next up: I was happy to see this point brought up in the __sexandthecity community, because it really really bugged me: WHERE THE FUCK WAS MARCUS??? Yes, it's been a few years and yes, tragic breakups happen every day, but they explained the absence of "Ma" -- where was the explanation for Marcus?

And speaking of Stanford's apparently single status, did anyone else have less of a problem with him and Anthony kissing than they did with him and Anthony saying "Oh, thank gawd you're here!" when they first saw each other at that party? I already made this comment over at __sexandthecity, but kissing each other when everybody else is kissing? Yea, sure, it's New Year's, there's been alcohol, eh -- what the heck. But happy to see each other at a party? As if. Given that scenario (at a party and the only familiar face belongs to Anthony), it seems to me that Stanford's reaction would be more along the lines of "oh crap -- I don't know anybody here except that bitchy little queen..." than "oh, thank goodness you're here!"

Other things that bugged me: Smith, Samantha and the ring. What was up with that? Like anybody couldn't tell he was bidding against her from the moment Charlotte (or was it Carrie?) said "she's bidding for someone on the phone." He knew she wanted it, he knew she was going there to bid on it, so he had some woman go there as his proxy to bid against her? What sort of sense does that make? And if you want my two cents on their breakup ... ugh, I've got a lot more than two cents to give about that.

Would Smith ever stop fucking Samantha? Not unless he was in a full body cast, no. Would Samantha ever move away from New York? Equally unlikely. And would Smith have been upset if, given all of those circumstances, Samantha said "I need to get laid and, since you're not doing it, I need to find somebody who will"? Doubtful. Samantha wasn't down with Richard cheating on her because he was cheating -- he lied and went behind her back. But she's always been conflicted at best about the whole idea of being monogamous with Smith. I dunno. I may just be bringing my own stuff to this, but the whole situation struck me as more about Samantha being unhappy in LA than Samantha being unhappy with Smith.

And speaking of relationships ... oh Miranda. Miranda Miranda Miranda. Are we seriously not going to talk about your depression, which seems likely to be a side effect of menopause? I seem to recall some mentions toward the end of the series about menopause ... and, what -- everyone went through it in the three years since the series ended? I gather it's because menopause isn't, you know, sexy, but hey -- neither is breast cancer, and the series dealt with that just fine. So instead of just making Miranda look shrill and irrational, howzabout a little insight as to why.

A few random other thoughts:

It makes me feel weird to hear Big called anything but "Mr. Big." If anything, they should have made revealing his name a big deal, not just a casual aside.

The big wedding happens within the first hour of the movie. Yea, nobody could tell that that was going to go wrong. It's like when they find the murderer in the first fifteen minutes of Law and Order: they're got a bunch more time to fill, so you just know it's gonna go south.

Carrie gets the two best lines in the movie, and both while they're in Mexico: "That was like taking a bullet" and "I think Charlotte Poughkeepsied her pants."

Oh, and WHAT THE FUCK happened with Daphne Rubin-Vega? To go from starring as Mimi in Rent on Broadway to "Baby Voiced Woman" in the Sex and the City movie? Wow. Who the fuck did she piss off?

Oh, and Samantha fat? Hardly. Gained a few pounds? Sure. "Fat." Yea, right.

And I guess that's it for me for the moment. If you haven't seen the movie yet, be sure to click back on this post once you do, because I'd love to hear what you thought.

Comments

( 8 comments — Leave a comment )
bluescissors76
Jun. 1st, 2008 08:16 pm (UTC)
I wondered about Marcus too. I guess they can't put every character in, but still sad. Some of the characters might as well have not been there at all (Madga, even Harry). And the Samantha-fat thing was just crazy. I didn't even understand what they were freaked out about until whatshisface said something, and I even knew that was going to be a plot point. I don't think it was set up well ahead of time. I don't remember her overeating or anything.

I thought the Miranda story was good. The Carrie parts were typically Carrie. Although I do kind of think her having an assistant really pushed the bounds of believability. Although on the other hand, why would THAT be the most unbelievable thing? That apartment was pretty unbelievable.
hopita
Jun. 8th, 2008 02:33 pm (UTC)
Samantha's eating habits
I remember a point when she was watching Dante and eating large gobs of guacamole, but that's about it.
i3uffalogirl
Jun. 1st, 2008 11:53 pm (UTC)
I went to the premiere, I loved it, and I really don't have any complaints. :) Perhaps I'm just easy to please.
trappedinabay
Jun. 2nd, 2008 03:55 pm (UTC)
The Stanford and Anthony thing bugged me, too. Come on, they hate each other! What the hell!

Personally I'm glad Sam ditched Smith. I've never thought he was even remotely attractive, and especially not in the movie (whoa, time has *not* been kind there), and he just annoyed me. She's better off being single.

I was worried that Steve wasn't going to show up on the bridge.
hopita
Jun. 8th, 2008 02:34 pm (UTC)
Smith
I went to see the movie a second time and I believe the problem is freckles. Too much sun exposure = freckles, which do not look good on him.

Edited at 2008-06-08 02:35 pm (UTC)
anjeelou
Jun. 15th, 2008 01:58 pm (UTC)
Finally...
Okay finally I saw it...
Now. Okay first, let's see. I looooved the Stanford/Anthony couple thing! How great! That was the only really surprising part of the movie, I thought.
Oh - they revealed his name in the last episode. That's why I think they didn't make a big deal of it in the movie.
Yeah the ring thing was so obvious... and the "love" password...
...the thing that bothered me the most was HOW FUCKING LAME WAS IT that the love letters turned out to all be emails? Meh.
And we here in Korea also did not like her wedding dress, although we liked the bird hairdo.
And I will probably write more in my actual journal...
hopita
Jun. 15th, 2008 02:37 pm (UTC)
Re: Finally...
I wrote a whole big response and then my computer crashed.

But I do remember this part:

the thing that bothered me the most was HOW FUCKING LAME WAS IT that the love letters turned out to all be emails?

I was more troubled by the fact that the "From Me" email was so amazingly pathetic. He copies two dozen love letters from the book but all he can come up with is two sentences of his own? Ack.

Also, I didn't like the dress or the bird. And Miranda's wedding hair was the worst.
(Anonymous)
Jan. 18th, 2011 02:57 am (UTC)
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( 8 comments — Leave a comment )

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