I know that I am loved. I know that there are people who care about me and who would be genuinely saddened if I died, as opposed to the weird mixture of guilt and disbelief that most people seem to be feeling about Gus. But damn it -- I want to be noticed. I want someone to notice if I don't get up from bed, I want someone to notice if I lay dead in my car for three hours.
Ugh. I fear I'm not explaining myself particularly well. I suppose what I'm feeling is isolated, and what I want to be feeling is included.