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Kol Nidrei

It's late and I should be sleeping (and I suspect I will be soon), but I had a few last lingering thoughts I wanted to share.

Tonight was Kol Nidrei; tomorrow, Yom Kippur. I'd actually forgotten all about the Kol Nidrei aspect of the holiday until I started reading about it in other peoples' journals (d'oh!). This kind of surprises me, as Kol Nidrei used to always be my favorite part. I love the prayer, and, in those Reform Synagogues I've been to, I always dug the cello (I got the sheet music once during the days when I was taking cello lessons -- it involved more than three clefs and was way over my head).

But since my Grandmother died, neither my Mother nor I have been able to afford Synagogue membership (well, I suppose if you want to get technical, we couldn't afford it when she was alive either -- we just used her membership and ordered "guest" tickets. Apparently membership for a 91 year old widow is comparatively cheap). Now, since my Uncle Tommy died I've more or less given up on religion, but, well, I miss the music the most, I think. And there was something about going to Shul that really did signify the beginning of the year, and of fall.

So here I sit, in my kitty cat pajamas and Cocaine Bob's sweatshirt, pondering the Jewish New Year and also my headcold. Three days without a cigarette have left me congested, wheezy, and sore, and I want to make a very serious point to try to remember how crappy cigarettes make me feel the next time I'm feeling the urge to light one up. Also on my mind is the fact that I got called in early to work (because two other people called in sick as well), and by the end of the night, I was feeling that used up exhausted feeling that just made me want to be held. My fellah was nowhere to be found, so I came home. And, as long as we're throwing random stuff out there, it was eight years ago today that my Stoney cat died, right here, in my arms. I miss her to pieces sometimes, and still remember the words of the email that bishopjoey sent me when he heard the news: something about her seeing me "through thick and an awful lot of very thin..." I printed that email out and saved it. I suspect it's still in my kitchen, along with the poignant email that Daryk wrote after the September 11th attacks.

Comments

( 10 comments — Leave a comment )
ratphooey
Oct. 13th, 2005 04:40 am (UTC)
I really hate how expensive synagogue memberships can be. Ugh.

Stupid organized religion.
hopita
Oct. 13th, 2005 04:49 am (UTC)
We wanted to go to Beth Shalom. You may (or may not) recall that they had a hideously horrible fire about five years ago (give or take). Well, apparently in addition to membership fees, everyone is expected to make a donation to the building fund as well.

lilostitch was able to go to Temple Sinai, but then again, she's a student, and that can be enormously helpful when pleading broke.

My Grandmother had the family's copy of a book that was given out at B'nai Israel's 25th anniversary, in 1929. B'nai Israel is gone now, but, for my part, I plan to read its history of the Jews in the East End of Pittsburgh (and specifically Highland Park and East Liberty) tomorrow. It seems a moderately appropriate thing to do.
ratphooey
Oct. 13th, 2005 05:04 am (UTC)
That sounds like a good thing to do.
lilostitch
Oct. 13th, 2005 10:30 am (UTC)
I was only able to go to temple sinai b/c i'm a student and they let students in for free :/
today, my friend sam has urged me to go to hillel....although the Reform service is being held in a 2nd floor lounge, complete with Television, Playstation, and pool table. A few years back Hillel used to hold services in the auditorium in Bellefield hall....they had to do a sort of "fusion" service for all denominations, but the setting was more appropriate than the lounge
i'm sure you could show up to hillel today (service starts at 9:30 am), and they'd be happy to let you in. They don't ask for student ID or anything
hopita
Oct. 13th, 2005 12:51 pm (UTC)
Actually, my friend Adam told me about something at The Friends Meeting House at 10:30. Seeing as it's already 9:00 and I'm still in my pajamas (and, oh yes, sick as a dog), I think that might be the more realistic option.

But where is Hillel anyway?
lilostitch
Oct. 13th, 2005 03:54 pm (UTC)
It's in Oakland on Forbes Ave.
I just left from there....it's a very studenty thing. Not much in agreement with what my idea of an appropriate Yom Kippur is.
The torah was actually stored under a tallis ON the pool table. And it wasn't even facing east. I know, petty things, petty things...and it's a good experience for the girl who led the service (rabbinical student), but entirely too casual for me....the rabbinical student wasn't even wearing shoes! she was wearing some white linen outfit thing!
whaaaat?!

i hope you feel better
hopita
Oct. 13th, 2005 05:58 pm (UTC)
Well, I know that you're not supposed to wear leather shoes on Yom Kippur ... maybe her outfit had something to do with that?

I went to the thing at The Friends Meeting House and it was GREAT! You really would've liked it, I think. A little too Reform for my taste, but really, my complaints were few, and the good things were plentiful.

The group is called Sukkat Shalom and they have Sabbath services there every Friday at 5:30 pm. If you're interested, I might be persuaded to join you there some Friday.
lilostitch
Oct. 13th, 2005 06:42 pm (UTC)
I thought the Friends Meeting House was Quaker for some reason...
and I totally forgot about the leather shoes thing. It all makes sense to me now. I used to remember a lot of this stuff, and I've forgotten a lot of it.
I'd be interested in trying the place out sometime...although you would HAVE to go for me to go! I get all nervous in new places!
hopita
Oct. 13th, 2005 06:50 pm (UTC)
Well, The Friends Meeting House is Quaker, they just let Sukkat Shalom use their facilities.

So yea, you, me, Sukkat Shalom. Definitely.
nirbhao
Oct. 13th, 2005 06:20 am (UTC)
you are beautiful
( 10 comments — Leave a comment )

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